If it means a lot to You ((Sachi))

[Sachi Yamada]

”Sachi, I’m ready to be a father! More than I thought I was, and I’m so sick of being alone. I’ve wasted my life away so far, and I want to change that. I think you can help me change that, and you’ve already made me a better person, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you,” he took her face his hands and looked her dead in the eye, ”I promise I will never leave you again”. As Toshio said those words Sachi heart felt like it was bursting. She’d been waiting to hear those words for seventeen years and something in his eyes made her realise that he was being completely honest. When he took her face in his large and callous hands and looked deep into her eyes Sachi just couldn’t help herself, she had to kiss him.

Turning on his lap and straddling him, her knees next to his hips as she pulled his face to hers and pressed her lips to his, pulling herself even closer to him so their chests were pressed together. She removed her lips from his and peppered his face with kisses, ”Thank you, thank you, thank you so much Toshio!” she whispered before kissing him passionately again, moving her hands into his hand and wrapping her fingers through his jet black locks.

[Toshio Niigata]

Suddenly Sachi came onto him with such force that Toshio had no idea what to do. She kissed him passionately and he couldn’t resist the urge to kiss her back. He had to focus really hard so that he didn’t screw this up again. She kissed all around his face and he closed his eyes, letting her. ”Thank you, thank you, thank you so much Toshio!” she whispered, and Toshio smiled and held her tighter. She kissed him passionately again and ran her fingers through his hair, making his spine tingle. He moved his hands down to her waist, massaging her hip-bone with his thumbs. He hadn’t kissed her- or anyone else- like this for almost 20 years, and it felt good. With his eyes closed Toshio pretended that they were 16 again, and that Sachi wasn’t married. All of a sudden he opened his eyes and placed his hand on her shoulder and pushed her away slightly. He looked into her eyes again. ”Sachi… you’re a married woman” he said solemnly, and it damn near broke his heart to push her away like that for that reason, but he just had to do it. It didn’t seem right to him.

[Sachi Yamada]

Sachi was shocked when Toshio pushed her away, looking into her eyes and said “Sachi...you’re a married woman” Sachi couldn’t help but blush and raise her hands to cover her mouth and gasped. ”I’m...I’m so sorry!” She pretty much launched herself off his lap and to the other side of the room, pressing her back against the wall as she looked at him, still sitting on the couch obviously shocked at her sudden movement but she needed to put the pace between them. Sachi was terrified to what Toshio was going to think of her now, she was a thirty-two year old woman with two kids and yet she was acting like a rebellious sixteen year old. Toshio made her feel like that, made her feel young again. She mentally laughed at herself at that thought. She wasn’t old, but some days when the kids were running around she felt twice her age. The mental laughter didn’t show on her face though, her shocked expression stayed on her face as she stared at him, not even daring to look away.

”Oh my God, what have I done!” she whispered to herself before looking down at her feet ”You must think I’m a whore! Throwing myself at you like that, what the hell was I thinking! I’m sorry Toshio, I love myself for a minute and I shouldn’t have presumed that you even wanted to kiss me, it was wrong...”

[Toshio Niigata]

”I’m...I’m so sorry!” she screeched. ”Sach…” he couldn’t get the word out fast enough before Sachi was already at the other side of the room. She looked horrified, like she had just done the worst injustice to ever be committed- not that she hadn’t, but that wasn’t the point. Toshio stretched his arm out toward her, pleading for her to come back to him, but she didn’t seem to notice. ”Oh my God, what have I done!” she whispered to herself before looking down at her feet ”You must think I’m a whore! Throwing myself at you like that, what the hell was I thinking! I’m sorry Toshio, I love myself for a minute and I shouldn’t have presumed that you even wanted to kiss me, it was wrong...” she spoke mostly to herself, babbling on about something that wasn’t even worth worrying about. Toshio blinked and then smiled. He slowly got up, trying not to frighten or startle her even more, and he made his way across the room to her. When he stood in front of her, he slowly reached his arm out to soothingly stroke her pinkish face. She was so beautiful, and to see a person like Sachi be demoralized by some idiot made Toshio really pissed off. She was a free spirit, a dove who had been captured and locked away in a cage for many, many years until she became obedient and submissive. It was heartbreaking, and Toshio no longer wanted to see her like this. ”Sachi…” he breathed, and he moved in closer, almost touching her lips with his, letting her decide whether or not to move forward.

[Sachi Yamada]

Sachi snapped back to reality when she heard Toshio say her voice, her eyes took a second to focus in just enough time to watch him move towards her and stroke her face moving his face closer to hers so their lips were almost touching but she knew he was giving her time to decide. Did she really want to do this? She was a married woman and she would technically be cheating if she did kiss Toshio again, but she really wanted to. She’d missed him so much all these years and she wanted him back. He’d said he would be a Father to her two children and Sachi couldn’t ask for more, he was perfect. What she was worried about was if she would be able to stop once she kissed him...

Sachi leant forward and let their lips touch briefly, barely whispering against each other. After a few light pecks she raised her arms to wrap around his neck and pushed her lips harder against his and raising on her tip-toes to even out some of the height difference between them. She couldn’t really believe that this was happening, she was sure that she would wake up any minute and would find herself alone in her bed at home. She subtly pinched her hand, a sharp pain made her smile as she threw herself more into the kiss knowing now that she wouldn’t wake up, this was real...

[Toshio Niigata]

Toshio gently closed his eyes as he waited for Sachi to make a move. He smiled when he felt her lean in closer to him, just barely touching his lips. He didn't kiss her back- not wanting to influence her decision-, instead he savored the taste of her cherry red lips. When she began to speed up and peck him more, he slowly started to move his lips in a circular motion. The kiss turned more passionate and Toshio smiled into it, pressing himself a little closer to her. "I love you... he breathed, and he could tell that she knew he meant it. His heart raced and he wanted nothing but to touch her again. He had had serious Sachi withdrawl for all of these years, and he wanted her more then anything. "Sachi, tell me you love me... he requested. As simple a request it seemed to him, he realized that it might've been a little too much to ask of her at a time like this. He sighed, broke the kiss and hung his head in shame. How could he confuse her like this?Was it him who was disrupting her life and making her unhappy? He couldn't live with that if it were true. He silently left Sachi leaning against the wall and moved back to the couch and dropped his head to his hands."Im so sorry. It wasn't right of me to ask you that".

[Sachi Yamada]

Toshio pressed himself closer to her before whispering “I love you...” Sachi’s heart started to race, ’Wait, did he really just say that he loved me...?’ Her eyes widened, she knew they cared greatly for each other but she had started to think that he could never love her again, not after them being apart for so long. Whilst they had been apart Sachi had been sure that he would have found another woman to love, she never once thought that he still might be waiting for her, still wanting to love her. “Sachi, tell me you love me...” he requested but then sighed an hung his head, just as Sachi was about to respond he silently walked back towards the couch, sat down and dropped his head into his hands. “I’m so sorry. It wasn’t right of me to ask you that.”

Sachi slowly took a step towards him until she stood in front of him and lightly rested a hand on his head, gently stroking his hair, ”Toshio...” she whispered ”Toshio, look at me....please,” she begged. When he finally met her eyes she knelt down in front of him and cupped his face, ”I love you, Toshio. I always have and I always will...” she gently pressed her lips to his and then looked into his eyes.

[Toshio Niigata]

”Toshio...” she whispered ”Toshio, look at me....please,” she begged, and Toshio lifted his heavy head from his hands. Her green eyes sparkled with a foreshadowing of oncoming tears, and she bent down in front of him. She cupped his face, and in return he cupped hers. They locked a hold on each other’s eyes, and what Toshio heard next made him the happiest man in the world. ”I love you, Toshio. I always have and I always will...” she spoke, and Toshio’s eyes went wide. He had wanted to hear those exact words for 17 years, and now that he had he didn’t know what to do. She leaned in and gently touched his lips. With his eyes still open in shock, he smiled. Closing his eyes slowly he kissed her back. When she broke the kiss he kept his eyes closed for a moment, hanging on to her touch. He opened them to see her smiling back at him. He smiled back at her widely, and then leaned in for another, more passionate kiss.

[Sachi Yamada]

When Toshio smiled widely back at Sachi, pulling her back in for a passionate kiss she was unbelievably pleased. She had panicked for a moment worried that when he was silent that he was regretting saying he loved her. She used to believe everything he said to her when they were together as teenagers but now-a-days she didn’t have the confidence to believe that someone as amazing as Toshio could love someone like her. But kneeling in front of him, wrapped in his strong arms she felt safe. She hadn’t felt like this with anyone but Toshio, Tadahiro had not even come close; he could never make her as happy as she knew she could be, as happy as she was with Toshio.

She pulled back from the kiss after a few minutes and now found herself sitting sideways in his lap on the couch, she smiled and wrapped her arms around her neck, kissing his cheek once before sighing, ”So...what happens now?”

[Toshio Niigata]

Toshio’s lips clung to Sachi’s as she tried to pull away, finally letting go and looking in her eyes he smiled. Sachi sighed, and she looked quite pleased. He liked when she looked content- not too happy, but not sad or angry either, just right. ”So...what happens now?” she sighed, and Toshio had to think a moment before giving a light shrug. ”I think you have to make your own decisions, and decide whats best for you and the kids. Its your choice, and you don’t have to make it now if you don’t want to. You’ve got your whole life to do whatever you want with,” he paused. ”And if you don’t want to live it with me or Tadahiro…” he didn’t finish. He realized that what he was saying wasn’t matching with what he was thinking, or what she was thinking, therefore it wasn’t making much sense. He shook his head. ”I guess what im trying to say is that you have to make the next move toward what you want. I cant do that for you, nor can I make decisions for you. Its all you babe” he smiled at her and held her tightly.

[Sachi Yamada]

Sachi knew Toshio was right; she did have to make her own decisions based on what was best for her children and herself. She knew she didn’t want to be married to Tadahiro anymore, she didn’t even want to see him but she knew that was easier said than done. She’d have to explain everything to Rai soon, she thought briefly about what would be better, telling Rai that her Mother and Step-Father were breaking up or that her birth Father wanted to see her.

”And if you don’t want to live it with me or Tadahiro I guess what I’m trying to say is that you have to make the next move toward what you want. I can’t do that for you, nor can I make decisions for you. It’s all you babe” She looked up at Toshio and smiled, ”Thank you” she whispered ”But...if it’s alright with you...I think I’m going to take Rai and Maiku with me to stay in a hotel or something, just until things settle down. And then when you’ve had some time with Rai and she knows all about you then maybe if she’s OK with it, maybe then we can come and live with you. As long as you’re being honest with me Toshio, if it’s going to be a nuisance for the kids and myself to be here you need to say now.” she took a deep breath before kissing him lightly on the lips ”Thank you Toshio, I couldn’t do any of this without you”

[Toshio Niigata]

”Thank you” she whispered ”But...if it’s alright with you...I think I’m going to take Rai and Maiku with me to stay in a hotel or something, just until things settle down. And then when you’ve had some time with Rai and she knows all about you then maybe if she’s OK with it, maybe then we can come and live with you. As long as you’re being honest with me Toshio, if it’s going to be a nuisance for the kids and myself to be here you need to say now.” Toshio gulped. He took a quick look around his small apartment and sighed. He could only imagine what it would be like to have a family of four living in this cramped place. He shook his head, and before Sachi could get the wrong idea he spoke up. ”I’m gonna look for a bigger place. I don’t think anyone would like living here. Theres no privacy!” he said with a wink towards her. She smiled and kissed him, and he kissed her back. ”Thank you Toshio, I couldn’t do any of this without you” she said, and her eyes sparkled. His mouth dropped in awe of her beauty, and he blushed a little. He sighed. ”No, thank you.”

[Sachi Yamada]

“I’m gonna look for a bigger place. I don’t think anyone would like living here. There’s no privacy!” Sachi couldn’t help but blush as Toshio winked at her. She couldn’t help but get a little lost in her thoughts of all the things they could do with privacy. When Toshio thanked her she furrowed her brows and cocked her head to the side,

”Why would you need to thank me? I haven’t done anything, well expect from causing you a lot of trouble.” She help his large hand in her own, running her fingers along her knuckles, noticing a few small old scars on them. She hoped they weren’t from fighting, she knew that he sometimes had a short temper when they were younger, he had always been so preotective of her if she ever got into any trouble he was always there to protect her. It was on of the things that made her fall in love with him.

[Toshio Niigata]

Toshio smiled and he brough up his free hand to cup her cheek, and rub it soothingly. He sighed again, this time totally emptying his lungs. "Sachi...there are so many things i could thank you for...but," he paused and smiled. Leaning in closer, he spoke. "The only thing that comes to mind right now..." he whispered, and kissed her cheek a few times. "Thank you, for loving me" he said plainly. He knew that his words might have sounded empty and cheesy to any other person, but to Sachi they might have increased her lifespan by 10 years. He smiled widely and kissed her full on the mouth once more before resting his head on top of hers. "Marry me... stay with me forever!" he breathed, not caring how carried away he was getting; this was how he felt, and he wanted Sachi to know that. He loved her so much- more than anything else in this world-, and he wanted to be a part of her life- and family.

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[Sachi Yamada]

"Sachi...there are so many things i could thank you for...but,” he paused “The only thing that comes to mind right now..." he whispered, and kissed her cheek a few times. "Thank you, for loving me" Sachi couldn’t help but smile, she really did love him especially when he was so sweet to her. They kissed passionately before she was tucked under his chin, his head resting on top of hers, “Marry me...stay with me forever!” she felt his breath on her head as her eyes widened. She didn’t know what to say, she took a deep breath and pulled back to meet his gaze,

”What did you say?” she could only manage a whisper as she looked at him. All she wanted to do was through herself into his arms and say yes but she wasn’t even sure if he meant it. ’Maybe he was just caught up in the moment. He couldn’t possibly want to marry me, we’ve been apart for so long and why would he want to take on two kids, one of which is not even his’